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Posts with tag snakes on a plane

Open Source Movies -- Wave of the Future?

If you're like me, you loved the "Choose Your Own Adventure" books as a kid. It can be exciting to help shape something you'd otherwise be passively enjoying. That practice is slowly working its way into the film world. The future of filmmaking may give you, the audience, much more say in what kinds of movies get made. "Open Source" cinema occurs when the underlying "source code" for computer software is made freely available, enabling anyone to copy a film, rewrite it, edit it, improve it. It's sort of like the film version of Wikipedia. Several full-length Open Source films have already popped up online, such as Cactuses, "a drama about youth culture in southern California," and Boy Who Never Slept, an online dating comedy. This article cites the experience with last year's Snakes on a Plane as an example that the studios are becoming more open to letting the public shape the films they make.

Open Source filmmaking aims to eventually allow the viewer the opportunity to create alternate endings and cut scenes from Hollywood movies. (So long, Jar-Jar Binks!) A film called A Swarm of Angels is one of the most ambitious Open Source projects, as it includes every aspect of traditional filmmaking, including the financing. The founder, Matt Hanson, wants 50,000 "micro-investors" to chip in $60 to make a movie. 60 bucks buys these investors the opportunity to vote on such matters as screenplay decisions and shooting locations. They can work on filming when it begins, and when the film is finished it will be made available online for anyone to download and edit. If you've got cash burning a hole in your pocket, head here to join the moviemaking process.

Continue reading Open Source Movies -- Wave of the Future?

Snakes On A Plane Director Continues To Find Work

Even after the whirlwind of hype surrounding Snakes on a Plane, I think most people would be hard pressed to remember the name of it's director, David R. Ellis. Considering the ... mixed reaction Snakes received from critics and audiences, it's probably in the best interest of Ellis' career that it stays that way. So despite the bad reviews and cries of manufactured zeitgeist, Ellis seems to have managed to walk away unscathed and is already hard at work on his new film, Asylum. Now Variety has announced that Ellis, a former child actor and stunt man, is also attached to direct and co-produce the action thriller High Stakes for Persistent Entertainment.

The story follows two friends on a gambling trip to Las Vegas who rack up a gambling debt to the wrong people. The friends are then forced to become the subjects of a dangerous high-stakes bet to pay off their marker. Ronnie Christensen (Passengers) wrote the script and the film is set to start shooting this spring. There is no word on a cast yet, so Ellis and company are going to have to work quickly if they want to stick to their schedule.

Caption This Winners: Snakes on a Plane DVD Prize Package!

Okay, you folks were out of control with your submissions this go-round, and I think I'm officially sick of reading the words 'motherf**kin' snakes' in the same sentence. No more, I say! No more. Last month, we asked you to come up with the best caption for the above picture, and 82 of you stepped up to the plate with some -- shall I say -- "creative" stuff. It was definitely tough choosing the winners, but after a slew of late-night Taco Bell contest meetings, we here at Cinematical finally managed to select our top five captions. Once again, here's what all five winners will receive:

1 Copy of the brand spanking new Snakes on a Plane DVD (full screen version).

1 Copy of the official Snakes on a Plane movie soundtrack.

1 Snakes on a Plane shirt.

1 Snakes on a Plane hat.

1 Set of Iron On Images (which you can use to design your very own nifty SOAP shirt).

Check out the winning caption and the runners-up after the jump (keep in mind everyone wins the same package) ...

Continue reading Caption This Winners: Snakes on a Plane DVD Prize Package!

Tips for Tuesday: New to DVD on January 2

Woohoo! Happy New Year, DVD junkies! All right! Let's just kick off this year with a whole bunch of fantastic DVDs!

Beer League -- Low-grade softball comedy that's 100% positive there's nothing funnier in the world than poop, weiners, farts, pee-pee, boobs, burps, jugs, sluts, beer, penises and vaginas. Oh, and the word "joikoff," which is mentioned more times in Beer League than John F. Kennedy is mentioned in JFK. Aims (low) for the frat-boy crowd, but I lived in a frat house for two years, and we would have turned this thing off after nine minutes. Extras include an audio commentary, a few featurettes, and a whole bunch of Artie Lange-related wackiness.

The Covenant -- It's like The Craft got a sex change! A gang of goofy young warlocks make trouble for their enemies, or so I've heard; I haven't actually seen this one yet. But I got the "goofy" part from the trailer alone. Upside for schlock-fans: The director is Renny Harlin. Extras include a featurette and a (Harlin!) commentary.

Snakes on a Plane -- The worldwide mega-wild ultra-hip internet buzz sensation of the millennium ... that yielded a $13 million opening weekend and a total haul of about $34m. So much for internet buzz, eh? Still, a perfectly entertaining piece of mindless cinematic fluff, and one that'll almost certainly play better at home, because home is probably where you keep your beer and your bong. Extras include a bunch of featurettes, deleted scenes, gag reels, music videos ... but I just gotta hear the audio commentary between director Dave Eliis and mega-badass Samuel L. Jackson.

Oh, and new re-issues of Glory and My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Hmph. Let's just write this week off as a New Years Hangover. We'll meet here next Tuesday to talk about DVDs worth renting, like Crank, The Night Listener, The Illusionist and (one of my 2006 favorites) Conversations with Other Women.

Rent This: 'Snakes on a Plane'

Snakes on a Plane DVD It's a bird, it's a plane ... a plane with snakes on it! That's right folks, 2006's strangest movie phenomena lands on DVD this week, just in time to assure you a Happy Mutha F*%@in' New Year! The flight was a rocky one for this Samuel L. Jackson campfest, with an unparalleled level of fan-generated buzz (based solely on the film's overly simple title) spreading across the web in the months leading up to its theatrical release. But apparently the mania peaked too early, or maybe it was a mirage from the start and all its "fans" were far more interested in poking fun at the movie than actually seeing it. 'Snakes on a Plane' grossed a sorely disappointing $34 million, only $1 M more than its reported cost of production.

The filmmakers, unwisely it now seems, insisted the film was not intended to be "so bad it's good." And it isn't. It's so terrible it's excellent. It falls just behind 'Borat,' 'Talladega Nights,' and 'Beerfest' in terms of funniest movies of the year. 'Snakes' has everything you could ask for in a B-movie: bad special effects (the snakes, especially, are awesomely fake-looking), creatively choreographed deaths, gross miscasting (the dude from 'Fat Albert' as a bodyguard?), a soft-porn sequence, babies in duress and craptastically cheesy dialogue. (To whoever runs the Samuel L. Jackson Soundboard, could you please update it with some of the instantly classic lines from 'SOAP?') The dozens of exotic killer snakes – which, in hopes of downing the plane, the villain unleashes on your typical three-story commercial airliner, cause you know, a bomb would be really difficult! -- are all sorts of naughty. Not only do they chew up half the passengers, they often prefer to latch onto, um, sexually stimulating body parts. That's physical humor at its finest, pure and simple.

Especially Recommended for: B-Movie lovers, Samuel L. Jackson's faithful, the millions of you who teased Mr. Jackson into thinking 'Snakes' would be a hit

Though 'Snakes' failed at the box office, will it still be a hit on DVD? Add your two cents below, and come back to Hold the 'Fone every Tuesday for new DVD recommendations.

Other New DVD Releases This Week (Jan. 2)
'The Covenant'
'Artie Lange's Beer League'
'Shottas'
'This Revolution'
'Love's Abiding Joy'

POST: Will you be watching 'Snakes on a Plane?'

GET: Rent or buy 'Snakes' on DVD

GET: See more new DVD releases

Top 10 Guilty Pleasures of 2006


I have an issue with year-end best-of lists. Or, I should say I have an issue with making them, myself. Every year I think about giving in to the tradition, but then I stop myself when I realize that I haven't seen enough movies. There are the last-minute releases of late December to wait for. There are films I missed earlier in the year that haven't yet arrived on DVD. And ever since I took a hiatus from reviewing films, it has gotten worse, because I see fewer movies than I normally do. Typically I don't discover my favorite pic of a given year until the following year or later.

So, rather than write up a list that may change tomorrow or the next day or 10 years from now, I've decided to reflect on the bad movies I saw. I've definitely seen more bad movies than good movies, anyway. But rather than make a list of the worst of '06 -- I probably haven't seen the real worst any more than I've seen the best -- I fondly recalled the movies that were crap, but were enjoyable, nonetheless.

Some of the movies on my list are wholly guilty pleasures, while others have one or two specific aspects that I found more guiltily pleasurable than the movie itself.
  • 10.) Cobra Starship's 'Snakes on a Plane (Bring It)' video from Snakes on a Plane - Sure, Snakes on a Plane is a guilty pleasure -- it was made to be. But it is just too obvious to mention it as a whole, and anyway it really wasn't as enjoyable as it should have been or was meant to be. The music video during the movie's credits, though, is another story. In my opinion it overshadows the actual movie by a long shot. It may be as self-consciously intent on producing irony and camp, but it succeeds where SOAP doesn't. Maybe because it is catchy, maybe because the band looks like a parody of contemporary hipster bands, or maybe because it is shorter -- I am far more likely to return to the video for a good laugh than to the movie (not that I'll turn off the movie on a lazy Sunday with nothing better to do; it is still a guilty pleasure, itself).

Continue reading Top 10 Guilty Pleasures of 2006

Caption This: Snakes on a Plane DVD Prize Package!

Everyone's favorite buzzed-about Snake-tastic film is getting set to arrive on DVD this January 2, and Cinematical is here to give five lucky winners one helluva DVD prize package. You know the drill: The five people who come up with the best caption for the above picture will be sent some wicked gifts -- all SOAP-related -- and all of which are sure to put a smile on your face. When those crummy Christmas gifts leave you depressed and desperately in need of a pick-me-up, Cinematical will be there (as always) to save the day.

In order to qualify for the prizes listed below, you must submit your caption by 8PM EST on January 8, 2007, as that is when the contest ends. Also, you must provide Cinematical with a valid email address when you activate your comment so that we're able to contact you when (and if) you win. Wanna know what you'll be getting? Check it out:

The best five captions will receive:

1 Copy of the brand spanking new Snakes on a Plane DVD (full screen version).

1 Copy of the official Snakes on a Plane movie soundtrack.

1 Snakes on a Plane shirt.

1 Snakes on a Plane hat.

1 Set of Iron On Images (which you can use to design your very own nifty SOAP shirt).

Okay, now it's your turn. Provide us with the best caption you can think of, but remember to do so by 8PM EST on January 8, 2007. Comment. Email Address. Activate. It's that simple. Good luck!

Note: Contest now closed -- thanks for all your wonderful submissions. The winners will be announced soon ...

Real Snakes on a Plane -- Almost

Coming to you directly from Cinematical's WTF department comes this story from USA Today about a woman in the Philippines that perhaps takes the movies a little too seriously. According to the article, Philippine authorities on Tuesday foiled an attempt by the woman to smuggle more than 100 poisonous snakes and lizards onto a plane bound for Thailand. Luckily, an alert airport x-ray technician spotted what he thought was a snake in one of the woman's two large suitcases and alerted airport security. Give that guy a raise.

When the suitcases were confiscated by airport security and opened, authorities found dozens of soft drink and water bottles inside and sacks containing 50 monitor lizards, 39 cobras, 21 vipers, 20 other smaller lizards and 2 iguanas. Man, that's a lot of mother f-ing snakes, isn't it? Perfecta Hinojosa, regional technical director for the Philippine Department of Environment and Natural Resources, said that the snakes are considered "threatened species" but there is a large market for them in Thailand for use as medicine, food and even pets. On the black market, the snakes could fetch tens of thousands of dollars, she said.

So, what am I thankful for this Thanksgiving? I'm thankful for not having to fly on a plane with some crazy woman and her suitcases full of snakes. Thanks to an alert x-ray tech, some other people in the Philippines get to be thankful for that too. The woman who was allegedly attempting to smuggle the snakes was held for questioning by authorities but as yet, has made no statement. The snakes had no comment either.

Samuel Jackson Cleans Up for The Cleaner

Let me just state up front, for the record, that Samuel L. Jackson is the man (although his movie The Man did kinda suck). No matter, he's still the man and can do no wrong (well, except maybe for xXx and that shark movie. Oh, and that snake movie too). Ok, fine, he's the man who can mostly do no wrong.

Putting his few filmic transgressions aside (hey, he's gotta pay the rent and afford golf balls, right?) Jackson is still one of the most versatile, dynamic and busy mo-fos working in Hollywood today. Besides, anybody who can say they were in Goodfellas, Pulp Fiction, Coach Carter, S.W.A.T and Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith deserves all the props he can get, don't you think? That is a tasty list of credits.

And now, Jackson is adding another film to his already impressive, and crowded, resume -- The Cleaner, a thriller scripted by Matthew Aldrich. Who does Jackson face in this new thriller? Is it terrorists, greedy drug dealers, Dark Lords of the Sith or maybe more of those mother f-ing snakes on that mother f-ing plane? No, in The Cleaner, Jackson, playing an ataxaphobic neat-freak who cleans up crime scenes for a living, must overcome his compulsive fear of untidiness in order to solve a murder that he helped cover up while doing his job. As he investigates the crime, he eventually uncovers secrets of his past that threaten to change his life forever.

Cool. Sounds good to me. Sorry James Brown, Jackson is the hardest working man in show business. And I, for one, couldn't be happier about it. The Cleaner starts shooting in January. No word yet on co-stars or a release date.

What's your favorite SLJ flick?

Snakes on a DVD

While the film itself had everyone blabbing non-stop during the months leading up to its theatrical release, hardly anyone has mentioned the Snakes on a Plane DVD, set to hit stores on January 2, 2007. Does anyone even care about this DVD? Or are you all too busy ironing those nifty collectible "Snakes on my Nerves" t-shirts? (I have one in every color of the rainbow, in case you were wondering.)

Nevertheless, the cult flick will arrive with a slew of bonus materials and a price tag of around thirty bucks. And, since it's due out right after Christmas, Snakes is lining itself up to be the perfect return pick-up. Not digging those flannel pajamas grandma picked out for you at Target? Well, now you'll have the option to just return them and take home the Snakes on a Plane DVD instead. Ain't life grand? In case you're wondering, here are its features (according to IGN):

  • Audio Commentary featuring Director David Ellis, Samuel L. Jackson and more
  • 10 Deleted Scenes
  • Snakes on a Video Cobra Starship, includes music video
  • Pure Venom: Making of Snakes on a Plane featurette
  • Snakes on a Blog featurette
  • Meet the Reptiles featurette
  • VFX featurette
  • Gag Reel
  • Music Video
  • TV Spot
  • Theatrical Trailer

    Hmm, I wonder if the Special Edition DVD will include an actual snake to put us out of our misery. What do you think?

    [via Movie Blog]

  • Black Snake Moan Trailer in front of Jackass: Number Two

    While it was odd enough seeing the trailer for the upcoming Black Snake Moan in front of Snakes on a Plane, you could at least understand the logic. I mean, both films star Samuel L. Jackson, and with Snakes supposedly about to be the sleeper hit of the year, you understood why the studio would be eager to ride those coattails. It's just too bad that sleeper turned out to actually be in a coma.

    Even more perplexing though, was seeing a trailer for this film in front of Jackass: Number Two. What demographic are they going for here? Our showing of Jackass was filled with hooting and hollering teenagers who sat in stony silence during the trailer, and afterwards looked around confusedly and said "What the heck was that?" The movie features Sam literally chaining up a white girl in his house in the deep south, so that he can cure her of "the itch." The white girl is played by a nearly unrecognizable Christina Ricci, and she does look uncomfortably like a bad dog at times, being chastised by her master.

    I must say, it was an odd segue from that into the scrotum punching.

    Loose Lips Sink All The King's Men

    The New York Times tells us what happens when bad word of mouth hits before the movie does. It kills it pretty much dead. Sony Pictures ran into this with their latest dead-in-the-water film, All The King's Men. The film opened this past weekend at seventh place with only $3.8 million in ticket sales, and a cast that most studios would kill for: Sean Penn, Jude Law, Kate Winslet, Anthony Hopkins, Patricia Clarkson, Mark Ruffalo, and James Gandolfini. That has to smart; you'd expect to get at least four or five good movies out of those cast members, and instead Sony is left holding the bag on a real clunker.

    The problem, as the article states, is that once a studio announces that a film is being pushed back, it is basically announcing that "this sucker ain't done yet, we're putting it back in the oven and hoping for the best!" That kills any sort of forward momentum the film has, makes people scratch their heads and wonder what the heck the problem is, and almost always gives rise to a rumor somewhere that something has gone terribly wrong. It's bad enough when a studio doesn't hold any press screenings, like the recent Snakes on a Plane, but even worse when they reschedule anything for a year later. Just look at what happened to Mike Judge's Idiocracy. Shelving it made the movie even dumber.

    New Line Nabs Sam Jackson

    Although it ultimately fell rather short of expectations after the wild internet popularity experienced during run-up, Snakes on a Plane seemed to have impressed somebody over at New Line, because they've wrapped up star Samuel L. Jackson and his still-unnamed company to a two year "first look" production deal. On the heels of his mid-$30 million run with Snakes (which is not a dreadful box office sum), Jackson said of the deal: "I have made four movies with New Line so far, and they have all been immensely positive experiences for me."

    While they may have all been "immensely positive" for you, Jackson, I certainly can't say the same. I haven't seen Snakes yet, but I remember what you and Eugene Levy did with The Man; and let me tell you, there was nothing positive about that experience at all from my end of things. Nonetheless, I continue to like Samuel Jackson, and I'm excited to see what he brings to the table with the help of his new friends at New Line.

    Jeffrey M. Anderson's 400 Screens, 400 Blows -- Hanging Around

    Finally, finally the studios' attitude is coming back to bite them. Snakes on a Plane is in the midst of flopping; it had a major drop-off in just its second week. I'm convinced that, if New Line had screened it for the press, they would have staved off the bad rumors and earned enough good reviews to boost business. Instead they blamed their own ignorance on the press, as has been the trend this year.

    As of now, something like 25 movies have been purposely withheld from critics. Renny Harlin's The Covenant is the latest to join the hall of shame. What is perhaps more distressing than the studios' attitude toward reviewing press is their attitude toward the films themselves. Regardless of the press, it's the studios who have determined that these films stink. These are the same films they have paid for and hired artists to make, in some cases talented people like Neil LaBute and Nicolas Cage (The Wicker Man). It's like they've made a bad batch of widgets, and instead of throwing them away and starting over, they're foisting the tainted product on the public with no warning from critics. They hope that the gullible, dim-witted ticket buyers will help them make back a significant amount of their investment before word of mouth gets out. It's a new wave of disposable movies.

    Continue reading Jeffrey M. Anderson's 400 Screens, 400 Blows -- Hanging Around

    Box Office Report: Go Marky Mark!

    On a quiet box office weekend, Mark Wahlberg and his Invincible co-stars effortlessly outdistanced the competition: The film earned about $17 million over three days, while nothing else even broke the $10 million mark. In its fourth week in release, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby took in $8 million, good enough for the second spot; finishing third was Fox Searchlight's indie dreamboat Little Miss Sunshine which, after doubling its exposure to just over 1400 screens, made about $7.5 million, pushing its total earnings to $23 million. Though we still don't know exactly how much Fox spent on the rights to the movie, it's hard to believe they're not extremely please with its success so far -- only the craziest suit could possibly have dream of something like this.

    Among the films making their debuts this week, Invincible was really the only success. Beerfest opened on more screens (just short of 3000), but did disappointing business -- the Broken Lizard flick made only $6.5 million, the weekend's fourth highest total (since their stuff tends to blow up on DVD, though, they're probably not going to have to sell the house or anything). In more limited exposure, Idlewild found itself in sixth with $5.9 million, but its average of $6055/screening was easily the best in the top ten. (Oh and yeah, Snakes on a Plane stumbled badly: It dropped almost 60% to $6.4 million from a massive 3555 screens.)

    Full numbers are after the jump.

    Continue reading Box Office Report: Go Marky Mark!

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